3:24 p.m. - August 22, 2002
Yucky Gut.
My stomach is starting in on me again. The constant nausea, frequent trips to the bathroom, lethargy; just an all over feeling of blah. The last time this happend I ended up in the emergency room. I thought I was going to die. They never did find out what it was but it did go away...eventually. I had to quit my job to get it to stop. Hhmmm, maybe it was the boss. Yes, that's what it was. I just wish my insurance would be valid so I could see a doctor. I'm going to make a list and check it twice and hand it over to him. I'm going to insist on both types of thyroid tests, a blood sugar test, whatever that's called. I want to know why my head is killing me all the time. I'm hoping he can give me an alternative to Eskalith (Lithium) and maybe change my antidepressant. I don't want to have to take Ambien for sleep anymore. In other words, I want to be fixed so I work like I did 5 years ago. I want to have energy. I want to feel what it feels like to fall asleep on my own. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and not have to literally roll myself out of bed. Then I'm going to find myself a therapist (if coverage permits) and start working on myself. I know what's wrong I just don't know how to fix it. All I know is that I can't go on like this. I can't stand living with myself.
So what about David Westerfield? You think he's guilty? Mark and I are both a bit tentative in the jury's decision. I don't know why, I can't put my finger on it, but I just don't think they have the right guy. One of the neighbors made a comment to the paper this morning, something to the effect of; "I'm so glad they found someone guilty for this, now we can all rest". That statements strikes me as odd. What if they don't have the right "someone"? I guess it's different when it's someone like Alex Alejandro, the guy who allegedy kidnapped and killed Samantha Runion. He looks like a shady character, has a past, one that includes child molestation. He's someone that needed to be removed from society anyway. David Westerfield doesn't look like your typical child murderer. God only knows, I guess.
I should lift my head off this pile of papers and get to looking like I'm being productive...right after I take a potty break.
TTFN
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