9:37 p.m. - August 12, 2002
Suck it Up, Buddy
I spoke to soon last night. It was the first day of school from hell. O did wonderfully, went right into her class, found her seat and sat right down. Let's back up just a minute. The morning started out horribly. Matthew whined and cried all morning, we were running late and he wouldn't get dressed. Mark and I had to forcibly get him dressed. He cried the whole way to school and was literally hanging onto my leg. He wouldn't let me leave his desk. We went and stood in the back of the class while the teacher tried to calm him down. By this time his face was so blotchy that it looked like he had some terrible disease. Every once in a while he'd steal a peek to see if we were still back there. Finally we just walked out, gripping onto our hearts. It was absolutely pathetic. Mark kept telling him to "suck it up" and to "stop crying because all his friends were going to make fun of him". I was this close to ripping his arm off and beating him with it (Mark that is). He's about as understanding of emotional issues as a rock. He's either black or white. A fair weather friend is what they call them. I kept trying to explain to him that the only thing Matthew could focus on at the moment was the fear he was having. He couldn't have given a rip what everyone else was thinking. I hate to say it but, my husband is like a piece of 20 grit sandpaper against an open wound. I think his family is so used to not "feeling". I just wish he could be a little bit more understanding, or at least try to be, than to tell everyone to suck it up. Needless to say his name is all over my shit list.
I did go over to the school at lunch time to peek in and saw him eating with the girly girls. He was laughing so I was happy. His teacher called me after lunch to tell me that he did fine after we left. He asked her a couple of times when we were coming back but later settled down.
O did very well, no problems...yet.
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